To all the men I once loved/liked/lusted after. This one goes out to you.

It is true. I love men. And sometimes I have bad judgement and pick the wrong ones. And sometimes, I pick good ones. But if you’re a former man interest in my life, I’d like to tell you a few things.

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I still think about you. And this isn’t in a creepy way. It’s in a way where I wonder what you’re up to. If you’ve met anyone. And if you are still as good looking as I remember. Oh, do I remember.

I hope you’re happy. I really really do. I’m not even laughing when I write this. Because I mean it.

If you hurt me, I’m over it. See the above. Because I really do hope you’re happy.

If I hurt you, I’m sorry about it. I am a self sabotager so forgive me.

If I never told you how I felt, I wish I would have. If you were just a friend, I wish I would have told you even more. Being a coward is for the birds.

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Sometimes I’m tempted to text you and say Hi. But I don’t because I worry you’ll think I’m a psycho killer loser. Which I’m not but people are weird and tend to read into a simple text. It doesn’t mean someone is stalking you when they just say hi. FYI.

I often wonder if you think of me. Do you check my Facebook page to see what I’m up to? If I’m still look good? If I’m dating anyone (i’m not)? I hope you do. Not in a psycho killer loser way either. Because then that would be stalking.

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If I knew your parents, I wonder how they are. Breakups are hard because that also means you break up with the family. And sometimes I like your family more than I like you.

I kind of wish I didn’t tell you all those embarrassing things about myself. It doesn’t seem so funny now that we’re strangers.

If I knew you in the younger years, I wonder where you are. What you’re doing. How life worked out for you. And if you’re still as good looking as I remember. You probably are.

I miss you. It might just be the idea of you but I miss you. Take my word for it. I don’t miss everything about you but if I liked you to begin with, I can assure you that I miss something about you.

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In closing, I hope you are well. Know that I’m still thinking of you (not in a creepy slasher killer psycho way). I hope you’re well. I hope you’re thinking of me (not in a creepy stalker night-walker way). I hope our paths cross again soon (as long as you don’t hate me).

In defense of the single 20/30 something woman

I promise not to quote Beyonce too many times in this post. But it will be hard. After all, this is for all my single ladies. Ok, done.

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I’m 28. Almost 29. And I am single. I’ve learned to turn a blind ear to the questions that follow you on your awesome path of singledom. And I’ve gotta say… What’s with all the judgement? Have you forgotten your days of being single and care free? Oh you have?! Bummer. I’m pretty sure these truly are the glory days.

Since you seem to have forgotten friend etiquette, let’s go over all the things to STOP saying to your single friends/family members/perfectly good strangers buying dinner for one.

“What’s wrong with you?!” Oh yeah, it’s me. It’s gotta be right? If you ever say this to me I’ll punch you in the face. Because the truth is, there is nothing wrong with anyone who makes a choice to be single (unless you’re straight up crazy. then you might have a problem). We’re just holding out for the right one and why settle for anything less than the best?

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“You’re too picky!” Am I? You’re right. I guess I should just settle with Joe Schmo who totally sucks at life and will probably treat me horribly and we’ll have no common interests. NONE. You’re right… that sounds so much better than waiting on the right one.

“Don’t you want to start a life and a family?” Now this is weird butttt… I have a life. A really, really good one. And I have a family. A really, really good one. Both of those may change some day and I’ll totally welcome that change. But for now, I’m going to keep this to a party of one because I don’t need a baby before I have the daddy.

“Ugh. I remember being single. It was awful!” You’re right. I totally hate going on dates, staying out too late and having memorable nights with friends. Sleeping in until whenever is the worst. I hate doing whatever I want, whenever I want. SAID NO ONE EVER.

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“Don’t you get lonely?” How could I be lonely? I’ve got loads of friends and a good balance of solo time that I spend doing all the things that I want to do. Crazy right?!

“I’d never want to be single again.” Cool. Good for you. Hope you don’t wind up single EVER AGAIN. But for now I like it. As much as I like eating cupcakes. Which is a lot.

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“Why do you still go out all the time? You’re almost 30!” Yeah. Because when you were single you didn’t do the same thing? But you’ve probably already forgotten those days. Don’t worry, I’ll make up for all your missed time on the single dance floor. Also, age is just a number you fool.

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Have you learned anything there? Hopefully you did but let’s review what you should take away from this if you are single.

1- KEEP BEING AWESOME. Seriously, just don’t stop.

2- That’s it.

Here is what you should take away from this if you have single friends.

1- Don’t be a judgmental pain in the ass. It ain’t your life bro.

2- Live vicariously through your friend(s). He/She will come home with crazy stories. And trust me, you want to hear all of them.

I have friends that have a better half and even as a couple, they are outrageously fun to hang with. They are also a prime example of what I want my own relationship to look like. Don’t be like Eminem and Lose Yourself.

6 Months to a Year

6 months in Wyoming. A place I had dreamed about but honestly, I wasn’t sure I had the courage to pick up and move my perfectly ok life in Boston. But life is really funny and totally unpredictable. And I did it. How am I feeling about my decision?

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There were moments when it was hard. Like really, really hard. I missed my friends. I missed spending obscene amounts of money on overpriced vegan eats. I missed the bustling city life.

And then one day, those feelings were kind of gone. After about 4-5 months, I didn’t have the pang in my stomach anymore. I looked forward to weekends here with friends and embarking on brand new adventures with them.

Look, I still miss my friends from back home. But strong friendships last forever. You don’t need to see each other or even talk to each other everyday. Sometimes I see something funny and I send a quick text to a friend just to say “I’m thinking about ya.” And that’s the beauty of a real friendship. In life friendships will fade and you may lose people. But that’s life in general. Sometimes you no longer relate to old friends. And that’s ok. Let it go. Trust me. Put that energy somewhere else. I only wished I had learned this sooner.

Do I love it out here? Absolutely. Is this place my end goal? I’m not sure. There are still some mountain towns calling my name.

Why Wyoming? Why not Wyoming?! I love the mountains. And I get my share of them here. I feel pretty lucky.

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Do I have friends? You betcha! I have REALLY amazing friends. They understand my love of eating and are always down to get weird. They also already understand that I am a people person and I have too much energy. So sometimes they have to take a break from me. And I’ve learned to embrace it.

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Am I dating anyone? Nope. But it’s cool. I’m enjoying the “everything is new” phase.

What next? I have no idea. For now…nothing. This place is it for a while. I’m not ready to leave.  And I’m not ready to head back east anytime soon. (It took me a while to admit that to myself.)

Don’t you miss traveling all the time? Sometimes yes. But I’ve also found that slowing down has been good for my soul. And now I plan vacations that are meaningful to me. Life is no longer a check list and that feels kind of awesome. Plus my credit cards aren’t totally bleeding anymore. (Debt is not cool, kids).

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The verdict? I love Wyoming. I love the West. It turns out I’m not an ocean girl. I’m a mountain girl. Jagged peaks. Endless hiking options. It’s been calling me for a while. And I’m real happy that I finally answered.

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Question: Done anything super brave before that scared the pants off you but turned out pretty ok?!

Loving, lusting and lunching as of late

Happy (unofficial) end of summer. Or unhappy? I am sad that summer is bouncing out but I will say, I love the change in seasons. I love them! But from what I’ve heard… fall is a joke in Wyoming since we expect our first snowfall in late September. BRB. I am currently bashing my face off the keyboard.

It’s been a while since my last check in so I figured I’d share my love, lust and lunch as of late. I’m going to be honest, everything is still ruled by my running schedule and mileage. AKA, how much marathon eating am I doing?

LOVE.

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Trail Running in beautiful places. I made a trip down to Colorado Springs to enjoy some gorgeous trails. Running here is all kinds of wonderful. But so hot. It was 85 and I ran with my hydration pack and I still wanted to die a little bit. I’m pretty sure I smelt awful when it was over. Praise the heavens above for the invention of baby wipes.

LUST.

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The perfect boozecart. I’m having a hard time finding one and I’m convinced it’s the last thing I need in order to pull my apartment together. Which is a lie because I still need to hang things on the walls, put up curtains and buy a bed that will be suitable for two people. Not for a significant other but for when friends visit. Don’t get too excited now.

LUNCH.

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Oh. Something healthy. Between the 12lbs of cookies and organic/overpriced gummies from Whole Foods, I’ve managed to eat something that’s actually good for me. I got this bowl (a friend called it a “colon blow”) while in Colorado Springs at Ola Juice Bar. So good that I just recreated my own version at home with some BOMB peanut sauce. I’m going to drink the entire bottle later. I wish I was kidding.

There you have it kids. I plan on posting a 6 month Wyoming update soon. I’ve had a LOT of interesting things happen since I’ve moved and I’ve for sure learned a lot about myself. I can’t wait to tell you all about them. Just trust that I’m keeping it weird. Until then… rock on. Interpret that however you like.

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 (I’m fully aware I have hair in my face and that I’m wearing pig-tail braids. I’m not even sorry.)

If you give a runner a cookie

This post is pretty much dedicated to running. And eating. Because honestly, it feels like that’s all I’ve been doing. I mean, yeah, I did spend a weekend back in Boston for a wedding. It was a blast. Dancing, laughing, drinks. What’s not to like.

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But it’s back to life, back to reality in Wyoming. So I run. And I run. My new/old Brooks haven’t failed me yet. (If you’ve seen these before it’s because I used to run religiously in these. And then I killed them. Lucky for me, Sierra Trading Post carries them and unlike Taylor Swift, we decided we should forever ever get back together.)

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(Oh Brooks. you do all the hard work)

With the running comes the eating. Oh. And have I been eating. Everything. Anything. If it’s readily available in 5 minutes or less, I’m eating it.

IMG_9565Former vegan here. Ribs, cheese covered fries and piles of pulled chicken sandwiches smothered in cole slaw. Sorry vegans, I forgot how the other half was living for a few minutes there. MY GOD. IT WAS HEAVEN.

IMG_9592Oh. And the cookies. There have been cookies. For every mile I run, I eat a cookie. All I want to eat are cookies. Lots and lots of cookies. If you are reading this and you like me, will you consider sending me a cookie bouquet? Give a runner a cookie…and she’ll never stop eating cookies. God bless you and God damn you Whole Food cookie bar.

IMG_9561Life would be better if I would eat things like this. But who the eff wants to eat veggies post run?! I am not one of those people who can pretend a carrot taste like a chocolate bar. CAUSE IT DOESN’T. See what’s happening? I’m basically hungry all the time. It shouldn’t be that surprising considering when I’m not running, I’m out doing epic 6-8 hour solo hikes. Just for fun after I run 16-18 miles.

IMG_9588Rocky Mountain National Park is too close for comfort sometimes. Talk about temptation.

With all this running and hiking stuff, I’ve been trying to take better care of myself. I’m pretty lucky because my lovely friend,Vanessa, works at Northwest Foot & Ankle (in Portland, OR) and she sent me a beautiful pair of Correct Toes to try. I’ve been using them for about a week now in hopes to fix some of the foot/ankle/knee issues I’ve been having. People kind of forget that your feet are doing all the work. Myself included. I’ve worn far too many pairs of shoes that my toes DO NOT want to squeeze into. I’ll give more updates and thoughts after I’ve used them for a while. But if you read up and you like what you see, you can use the code KAMESFREESHIP and get free shipping on a pair of correct toes. Do it. Help your feet. Help yourself. MMMk?

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(my poor feet. just getting uglier by the day.)

Anyways. I’m still in Marathon Mode. I feel ok about it.  But I’m hungry. I’m so hungry. So I’m also marathon eating. Which is gonna make me have a marathon ass real soon. Whatever that means. I’m reading this article as we speak. Maybe I’ll learn something.

 

ANY TIPS FOR ME SO THAT I’LL STOP EATING EVERYTHING IN SIGHT?!

These are a few of my favorite things…this week

{Many thanks for sticking with me through the changes. I’ve been working on a better format/layout for this and will changing to a new web host soon-ish}

I’m getting ready to head out on a mini vaca to the east coast. This time I’ll be back in Boston for a wedding and spending some time with friends and family. Mad props to those that have been doing this traveling circus thing for a while. I’m still getting used to the idea of flying across the country, in either direction, to visit people. It’s hard work, but someone’s gotta do it.

 


 

So before I depart, I leave you with some of my favorite things this week.

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1- This necklace. I’m obsessed. I’m actually obsessed with the entire store. It’s locally made in Wyoming. Pretty soon my entire apartment will just have a Wyoming theme to it.

2- Farmer’s market finds. The farmer’s market season just started here in Wyoming and I’m looking forward to enjoying it for a few months. Some finds so far are local honey, fresh fish flown in from Alaska (this is not a joke. It would be nice if my parents would just start sending it to me so I could save my $25) and peaches galore.

3- These. I ate them for dinner last night. Sorry that I’m not even remotely sorry.

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4- 20 things you didn’t know your iPhone can do. Because we all need to know this. I NEED to know what planes/airlines are currently flying overhead. Thanks, Siri!

5- 17 of the best bad reviews of National Park on Yelp. Yep. These are real. Idiots are everywhere.

6- This glorious floral dress in my life. It would be a fun piece to have to transition into fall with some tights and booties.

BONUS:

7- My new favorite blog. She lives in Jackson and I’m slightly jealous.

8- 30 outdoor travel hacks. Remembering all of these for future outdoorsy plans.

Oh. And my favorite thing of this week. This girl. I haven’t seen the love of my life since February. I’m bordering bad aunt status so I’m making a special trip to Maine to see my number one gal. I hope she remembers my face. And I really hope she tossed out that tutu.

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Those are my fav’s of the week. Other than obsessing over all these things, I’ll be hanging out east coast style for a few days. I plan to enjoy some of my favorite eats and hang out with some of my favorite peoples. OH. And maybe try to get in a training run or two. But I’m making zero promises on that one.

Any current obsessions I should know about? I’m an impulse buyer so please let me know ASAP.

A summer PSA…from me, not PBS.

Even as a kid I understood that summers fly by way too fast. When school was out, I filled my days with biking to a friend’s house to enjoy time in the sun as we roamed freely around town. Where I grew up, roaming around town meant biking 2 or 3 miles to the nearest store to indulge in french fries with ranch dressing or ordering our favorite pepperoni italians from the country store (my hometown ladies know how delicious these are!) Life was good. We didn’t have a care in the world. These days, summers are a little different. Hours are not endless. They are limited due to big kid jobs.

IMG_9305(Building human pyramids in Lake George. Taking back our youth)

Summers now require planning. A shit ton of planning. When did schedules get so impossible?! I have to link up my calendar with all my friends so we can figure out best times to even call each other. It’s so bogus and so adult. I can’t stand it. My planner looks like a schizophrenic date book with scribblings on all of the pages showing where I failed to realize I double booked myself. It’s so lame and so pathetic. I want my youth back. When did a spontaneous life become impossible? Apparently, I lost it around the same time I lost the ability to drink without being hung over.

IMG_8772(the best gin cocktail I’ve ever had to pleasure to hurt from)

We’ve got about a month left of summer. But let’s hope it drags into at least September. The last two weeks have been all summer mode. Here are some snaps from my most recent summer antics and where I have been trying to take back my youth… or at least feel younger than 29.

IMG_9282(Trying to get under that shirt while crawling across a stage. Lindsay just kept giving more cowbell like a champ.)

IMG_9445(This is my first rodeo. It won’t be my last. Cowboy’s everywhere.)

IMG_9476(Pardon this picture but it’s proof I went to Tim McGraw. Not many people can pull off denim on denim.)

IMG_9490(Farmer’s market finds. That’s a pack of scallops. Wyoming knows how to farmer market up.)

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Running. This deserves some talk time. Yesterday I ran 16 miles. Like it was nothing. Marathon #2 is in October and honestly training hasn’t exactly been happening. So this was big. I think I finally got my head back in the game. I loved it. That sounds absolutely insane. But I woke up at 6am with a smile on my face and I felt good. New shoes don’t hurt either. 16 MILES PEOPLE. That’s just 10 away from running a marathon.

IMG_9432(With great running comes great responsibility… to drink beer. There are so many breweries in the area, you could drown yourself in beer if you wanted to.)

Ok. That’s my summer PSA brought to you by the letter SUMMER. How’s you summer? How are you taking advantage of it? Don’t blink… because it’s gonna be over so soon. I am weeping in the corner now. Happy Sunday and get outside!

 

 

All the ways we might meet.

Hey you. Yeah you, Future Boyfriend. Or ex? I’m not sure. I wanted to give you a heads up on all the ways we might meet. You see, I’m a bit of a daydreamer. So to say I’ve been thinking a lot about you would be a total understatement. I think about you when I’m buying groceries wondering if maybe when I turn the corner our carts might slam into each other. Our eyes would meet. I’d notice you were buying kombucha, mass amounts of chocolate and probably some chia seeds or something equally as weird. You’d likely have the latest Runner’s World magazine in your cart and you are probably polishing a bag of trail mix before you even get to the counter. I finished mine 5 minutes ago.


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I wasn’t joking. I’ve given this a lot of thought. I’ve never been afraid to fall in love…or lust. Which is why I’ve given our Meet Cue some thought. I hope it’s an organic meeting. Because life is just like a Rom Com right?

Running.

I’ve always had a thing for runners. I’m pretty convinced you might be an ultra marathoner. I thought it would be a good idea for me to volunteer at an ultra marathon. I saw you at mile 25. I gave you one of my famous homemade protein bars. You loved it. Because you love anything with nut butter and chocolate chips. You told me you primarily eat a vegan diet and you’ve got a thing for vegan nachos. I just died a little bit. You didn’t win the race but that’s cool. Running isn’t your life. You’re just naturally really good at it. And we’re going to run some miles together.

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At the dog park.

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Although I no longer am a dog owner, it doesn’t mean I won’t have one again. Because when I get my new dog that I’ve adopted, we’ll be at the dog park a lot because we’ve got to socialize. You’re a fellow mutt lover and your mutt is your new best friend. She’s the most important woman in your life (besides your mom) but you’ve got room for another one. I sat next to you on the bench. We struck up a conversation about our love of dog adoption, day drinking and really good iced coffee. Not only do we get along great, but our dogs have become fast friends. I’m thinking mutt puppies in the future.

At the airport before a flight home.

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This is a long shot. What if we don’t live in the same place?! You should know I’m not opposed to long distance. I actually once read an article that said couples in long distance relationships are more likely to try harder and have better communication. You saw me, I saw you. Something clicked and here we are. Our flight is delayed, we have a beer together. You are an avid outdoors man but you hold a steady job because being a Peter Pan isn’t an option for you.  You love multi-day treks, craft beer and you make a mean burger on the grill that is ALWAYS topped with avocado. Before we know it, we’re boarding the plane. Man, we had too much fun. Lucky for me, you switched seats and sat down next to me. Me at the window and you in the aisle. Match made in travel heaven.

 

At the book store.

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I was likely picking up another Young Adult read. You were killing time before an appointment. Or was your car getting fixed? I can’t remember but we struck up some small talk. You asked me how the book was that I was looking at. It was 50 Shades of Grey. Trust me, you’re going to be glad I threw the book over my shoulder out of embarrassment.

 

The Farmers Market.

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This is the biggest contender. We both love fresh produce. We love over priced berries. And most importantly we both appreciate buying local. We both reached for the same box of strawberries. They were the best looking bunch to be fair. We joked. Lots of sarcasm. You asked if I wanted to grab coffee, I said yes. I am so glad I did.

 

Now you see I am a dreamer. But let’s be honest… you think about these things too. I’m not that crazy. I’m just a hopeless romantic. And I have no intention of changing that.

A Wyo Update is kind of overdue

Sure, sure. I’ve been posting about my life in WYO pretty often. I’ve told you about what I’m doing. Where I’m going. The friends I have. But I haven’t really said much of anything else. Am I loving it? Am I hating it? Did I already pack up and leave?

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Let’s call this our virtual Champagne date, shall we?

First off- Love is a strong word. I’m not prepared to use it yet. But I can say life is good here. I’m really enjoying it. Wyoming feels like home now. You know when you’re driving somewhere and you stop thinking for 5 minutes and all of a sudden you are wondering how you got there? Yeah. It’s like that kind of home.

I’ve got great friends.

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Like the kind that get weird with me and accept my total strangeness. They get me. They take me, for better or for worse. And they are a lot fun to drink beers with and bust a few dance moves with.

But you’re not traveling as much? Yeah I know. And I definitely miss that. But I also missed out on life when I was traveling so much. It gets super lonely traveling solo and having no one to share it with. I decided a while ago that I wanted to live a life. Not live a check list. So I still plan to travel a lot but trips will be well thought out and when I can afford them. Because my credit cards were bleeeeeeding for a while there.

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How long do I plan to stay? I have no idea. I knew the move would be for at least a year. Maybe longer. Maybe forever. Who knows? I have a short list of things I want to do. Places I want to go. And even places I want to live. So I don’t know. But I will say that summers are here are kind of amazing. The weather is perfect. The distance to the mountains is perfect. Man… the summer nights are just perfection. Sometimes I catch myself grinning ear to ear when I’m out running at night.

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Dating in Wyoming. I could compare it to any other place. Men are Men. Regardless of where you go. As always, I’m hopeful. The best is yet to come right? The only thing I’m lusting after these days is this ice cream. I mean… it’s like really good ice cream. And for now, that will have to do the trick.

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So. Wyoming. It’s still a journey. One that is slowly just becoming life. I miss my friends from home but the fun part is, friends are friends. The best kind of friends are the ones that you don’t have to see or talk to all the time but when you do, it’s like no time has passed.

 

I’m getting on a plane in a few hours to head back east to spend a couple of days with friends on the lake. I couldn’t be more pumped. And when I get back here- it’s Cheyenne Frontier Days. It’s a pretty big deal. I’ve finally invested in the last “Wyoming Must.” Cowboy boots. And I’ll be heading to my first rodeo and learning all about Buckle Bunnies. Think Ski Bunny but the rodeo kind.

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Life is good. Life is great. I’m going to just keep rolling with the punches. And keep being weird. And I don’t plan to stop lusting anytime soon.